Sometimes you're out on a date and you think you're both having a good time, but at the end of evening when you're ready to ask her out again, she acts like all she wants to do is get away from you. It may sound dumb, but how can you tell if someone's interested in you?
�Sean, Ann Arbor, MI
You hit the jackpot. Yours is a question that all men and women have asked themselves at some time or other�whatever their age or experience.
There are some good books about how to read people's body language. That's one way to better understand people. Authors, like Dr. John Gray, write some excellent books on the subject of different male/female behavior.
I have my own philosophy, however, and I'd like to tell you what worked for me when I was out in the dating scene.
Have you noticed how nervous you get when you are out with someone the first few times? You spend all your time trying to figure out if you're saying and doing the right thing. You probably feel on edge and act uptight much of the time. Sound familiar?
After years of driving myself crazy by doing this, I figured something out. I noticed that when I was comfortable with someone�we just seemed to click and the conversation flowed�I didn't spend time trying to figure out if the other person liked me or not. It was like I was with a friend. I didn't feel like my friends judged me or I needed to act a certain way to be liked by my friends. I could just be myself and have a good time.
The fact is I liked who I was when I was with my friends. I realized that I needed to be around people that allowed me to feel good about myself when I was with them.
Sean, you don't need to figure out exactly how anyone feels about you. Learn to notice how you feel about yourself when you with different people. You'll start acting more at ease and feeling more confident. You'll also start spending more time with people that like you just the way you are. Women will find you more relaxed, more confident, and more appealing. Without even consciously trying, you'll be a better listener and appear more interested---traits women love in a man.
When you focus on how you are feeling about yourself, your dates will be more comfortable and consequently making plans to see each other again will happen more naturally�just like it does with your friends.